My Dear Friends,
It’s late. It has been too long since I have written, and particles of what I wanted to say have been lost. I will do my best. I am no stranger to lack of sleep; we are old friends. It allows me to do the things that get otherwise pushed aside. I am home. I say with total confidence that there is truly nothing like it. There were pieces of myself I did not realize were even missing until I walked through my front door. I am thankful. I, like you, have taken further steps on my path. There are things I understand better now. Tonight I will write about one.
I am terribly flawed. I knew that before I left; I understand it better now. Pick at me, and you will find them. You will find the lies in my teeth, and the manipulation in my eyes, and the greasy pride in my sort brown hair. Pick. Pick away. I am not afraid.
You my dear friends, all of you, are terribly flawed. As you choke on your lies, and deny your own actions, and let cruel words drip from you mouth about those who are not there to listen. It’s not a secret. Deny it if you would like, for it is not accusatory.
What I have learned though, is not that everyone is flawed, but who I want to be in the midst of all these flaws, both yours and mine. It is important to see them, first your own and then other’s. However the next step, the new step, is not seeing past them, but seeing through them. Seeing the person underneath them, and why that person is still in your life. There is beauty there. It is marred, of course, but organic. This is what is important to take. As always, I am a student of bettering myself, so this is not an art mastered but a philosophy in trial. And really, it’s just a thought…..
I am inexplicably lucky to have every single person in my life. From a distance, every one of you radiates a light. I can see it out my window. I am grateful.
